Green eyes doesn't even have cable but she has thoughts.

Secret guilty pleasure admission du jour:

Sometimes I sing those FreeCreditReport.Com commercials to myself... Except for it's out loud... And occasionally for the purposes of serenading my dog while I hold him up and make his legs dance along. Or serenading an entire subway car, whatEVER...Tomay-to, Tomah-to.They are just so gosh darn clever!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zMXv0__CYSU

I mean, come ON! That is a straight up treat!

Non-secret guilt un-inducing HATRED du jour...as well as every other jour:

That Glade candle lady.... I mean, come ON! First of all, you are annoyingly tall. I can especially tell when you do your FAKE yoga with your lame ass friends! Your downward dog is NOT evenly distributing your weight among your limbs and I certainly don't think you are doing your best to plant your ankles into the ground!
Furthermore, how dare you betray the brand (Glade) that has served you so well and let you become a lazy hang of a housewife who wears pleated khakis?! When you told your other, also lame ass, friends that it was a "French scent..Y'know, from France!" you not only bit your thumb at a loyal product that has apparently changed your existence for the better BUT you ALSO made MY life miserable because it prompted your queen-of-idiots friend to announce "Ohh! Haven't you heard of Glah-day?!" Thus, getting on my nerves whenever I, in true masochist fashion, sit through that commercial.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E4jScvBuGHI


How dare you. You should go get a job.